The Bungee Cord 8-21-17

Hello,

     I turn 60 this week.  60!

    I suspect that for younger readers of the Bungee Cord, that sounds pretty old, or at least it seemed old to me when I was young.  60!  But for those of you older readers, I suspect that 60 seems pretty young to you, and many who have passed this milestone in life have told me so.  Ah, 60!

     As I pass this milestone in my life, I am led to reflect on these 60 years.  To reflect with absolute amazement on all the things that have changed in the world.  Who would have ever believed in the year that I was born, 1957, that the phone that I carry in my pocket would be more powerful that a computer that filled rooms.  To reflect on all the pain and suffering that have etched their misery upon the retina of my eyes, and I find myself singing along with Jackson Brown…. “Doctor my eyes have seen the years and the slow parade of tears….”.  To reflect on the countless number of times that my heart has exploded in joy and wonder, creating a stream of memories that like marching bands have paraded through my life.  To reflect on my struggles and failures that like leaches live off of me and refuse to let go.  So many things to reflect on that have filled these 60 years…so many that I have forgotten more than I remember.

     But,

“³ When I look at your heavens, the work of your fingers,
   the moon and the stars that you have established; 
⁴ what are human beings that you are mindful of them,
   mortals^* that you care for them?” (Psalm 8)

Although 60 years may be a long time for me filled with innumerable memories, the span and the events of my life do not add up to what God can gather in in the blink of God’s eye.  To the one whose hands have been endlessly at work creatively shaping the universe, and to the one whose vision encompasses time and beyond….the work of my hands and the gaze of my life is microscopic in substance and importance.  “What am I (a human being) that God is mindful of me, I (a mortal) that you care for me?”

     God answers that question by the Good Friday cross and the empty Easter tomb.  Everything.  That is God’s answer to this question.  What am I that God is mindful of me, I, that God cares for me?  I am everything to God.  So much do I mean to God that God gave everything in order that nothing might separate me from God.  So much do I mean to God that God conquered everything in order that nothing might take me from God.  God’s answer to the question that reflection on one’s life necessarily asks is, “Everything…everything to God.”

     Thing is that God’s answer is so outrageous that many find it hard to believe.  The product of an inner need to feel important.  Wishful thinking that stems from the fear of death.

     One thing that has happened to me in this span of 60 years, happened 36 years ago.  I married.  On the day that I got married, I heard someone say to me that I meant so much to her that she would let nothing ever separate us for as long as we both should live.  And the question that kept running through my mind?  “Who am I that someone should care so much for me?”  It seemed an outrageous thing to me.  An inner need?  Wishful thinking?

     Over the course of these years, I have come to believe the seemingly outrageous words that my wife spoke to me.  Her persistent love of me has made a believer out of me.  And so it is with God.  God’s persistent love of me has made a believer out of me.  Not the events of my life over these 60 years, but the relentless love with which God has filled each of my days has made a believer out of me.  As outrageous and unbelievable as it might be that I mean everything to God, God is determined that I would believe it….believe it so that I might live each day in divine peace, that I might confidently step in tomorrow after I have failed today, that I might stop spending all my time trying to become worthy and spend my time reaching out to those who the world has decided is not worthy of any one’s time, that I might look square eyed at my greatest fears and snicker with victorious delight.

     This week I turn 60.  60!  Don’t know how many days or years lie ahead, but this I have come to believe that as has been for 60 years…..  “What am I that God is mindful of me, I, that God cares for me?”  Everything!

     And so are you, too, no matter how old you are.

Have a great week.

God’s grace and peace, (ggap)

Pastor Jerry Nuernberger